Monday, September 29, 2008

A Sign Of The Times..The Return of The Extended Family

Because of some circumstances beyond their control, my middle daughter and her family have had to move in with me. My future son-in-law had a great job in construction but his company closed 2 months ago and he has not been able to find another job. He has custody of his eight year old daughter, and they have 2 dogs. It's been a very stressful time for them. Thank goodness I have room in my new house to accommodate us all, even if we are a bit cramped...we've been able to store all their furniture and stuff in the garage, Katie has the guest room for her bedroom and Valerie and Alan have the craft/office room for a bedroom. I had reluctanly just gotten a dog for my daughter last month...now there are 3 in the house!!! (ugh)...Not exactly how we had all planned our lives to be at this time, but with some patience, hope, love and faith, (and humor)...this too shall pass and we'll get through this difficult time. My daughter promises that they'll be taking care of me when I'm an old, frail lady (should I get that in writing?..lol)

At least three of my coworkers have had a similar situation happen to them. One woman I work with has had her mother-in-law along with the grown children and grand kids move in with her. Her husband took a job with a company building a power plant in Afghanistan ( smart man...lol). I think in these economic times, families like mine are going to be much more common.

16 comments:

rac said...

It's part of the new global economy. In order to compete with Chinese, we will all have to live like the Chinese. 4 or 5 generations per household will soon be the norm.

Doug said...

Cindy,
Maybe now isn't the right time but I've been meaning to ask if I could move in with you. I could bathe in your pool to save some money.

Ric Larson said...

Wow Cindy, you have a heart of gold.

Fortunately they have a place and family to retreat back to, while they are attempting to get there lives back on track. Some people are not as lucky or fortunate.

Joanna said...

It is the sign of the times but,hang in there because what goes around,comes around:)

Joanna said...

Cindy,Send your son-in law to Guam.Construction will be booming here with the Marine build up.8,000 Marines and their dependents.About 40,000 people in all.Lot of work ahead.:)

juliet said...

RAC, I think the Chinese already won that race. Cindy, I hope you and your kids apply for every federal aid program available. Food stamps, indigent medical etc. Maybe they can look into Fin. Aid for going back to school and learning a new skill. My grandmother always had money but she never forgot the depression and kept a supply of canned goods in the cellar, which cost her little because she used coupons at the supermarket. Anyway this summer I was looking into food programs for college kids( many are starving because they can't afford to eat after they pay tuition and books) and discovered some organizations that offer groceries for a small amount of money. Here is a link for Florida, I think I got some info off the Food Stamp web site. I would get as much help as possible and try and bank some money for what ever the next crisis is. You rock Cindy, I don't think I would be in a position on my own to take care of the whole family. Maybe you can get a utube ad going to have dog food donated. Your grand kids could get an organization going for all the pets whose owners are having a hard time. You will have to kick Doug out of the pool and store everything there. I wonder if there is a distribution food center for Pets going through the economic crunch? Maybe Bush's Dog "Barney" can whisper in his ear a last minute economic bail out program to keep the dogs from becoming homeless. Pet food is expensive.

Doug said...

Juliet,
unfortunately with the near trillion dollar "investment plan" soon to be rubber stamped by our congressional leaders there will be reduced or no funding left available for social welfare. The safety net for the displaced working class is and will be immediate family.
We, are on an island. Surrounded by a sea of rising, almost unfathomable debt. Fins to the left and fins to the right.

Sean said...

hmm 700 billion to get us out of this financial mess. I wonder what that amount would do towards solving the social security timebomb that's coming?

Cindy said...

Thank you all for giving me a smile this am with your encouraging words. Doug is right Juliet, we just have family to count on. My granddaughter does qualify for free school lunch, so that's a little help for them. It's kind of ironic that one of my frustrations in my marriage was that I was doing all the care taking!! lol, now I'm doing it again...must be my Karma...can't escape it. I bless my job everyday...I did have to be put on BP meds last week (was 183/107) yikes...I need to find some ways to chill out and relax. I'm sure you all must have some creative suggestions..and Doug, the blow up bed is still available if you need it but you'll have to bring your own BP meds.

Paul said...

Cindy, I feel for you. My mother inlaw (has lived with us for 17 years) had a stroke after the last big typhoon in 2002. She requires constant care now so we've hired a couple of live-in care givers. My wife's oldest sister, her family and the "built-in" Auntie moved in to help out with bills and care. All in all, we have 8 adults, 2 children and 3 dogs in the house.

Joanna said...

Paul,I feel for you,I know from experience.May God bless your soul!!and Family..

mat said...

Cindy, My son 25 and my daughter 23 still live at home w/Benita and I I have a dog a cat and 4 parakeets and an aquarium full of guppies and my grandsons on most every weekend. I was a contractor for a bunch of years and the best part about it is you do so many other things that you are qualified for a wide range of jobs. Being in maintenance allows you to use all those different skills. Your son in law should apply at all the hotels and apt. communities in town. Even in todays economy there is still a huge need for service professionals. It may not pay that great but it's a job and all the property mgt. companys and hotels offer some kind of health insurance. The upside is you're surrounded by family. Keep us updated.

Cindy said...

Wow Paul, you do certainly have a houseful. I am finding several upsides to the situation...getting to spend lots of time with my grandaughter (who thinks I'm pretty cool and who said the best part of moving was "getting to see MeMaw everyday"), being able to volunteer at work for any available OT and not feel guilty that Chelsea is home alone, coming home to a spotless house (my daughter is a much better housekeeper than me), and dinner made, and having my son-in-law around to keep up with the grass mowing.

Cindy said...

Also rediscovering family game night with Uno and Yahtzee..cheap entertainment for the 5 of us and showing my granddaughter how to have fun without the tv or video games.

Joanna said...

Priceless!I need to never forget that!Thank-You Cindy.

Joanna said...

Oh and everyone:)