At lunch time, sit in your car with sunglasses on, pointing a hairdryer at passing cars.
Page yourself over the intercom, oh, and don't disguise your voice.
Whenever someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
Switch the coffee maker to decaff over about a three week period. When everyone has gotten over the caffeine addiction, SWITCH TO ESPRESSO. He he.
In the "memo" section of you checks, always wright "for marijuana". (oops is that a hit work for the blog watcher. Hey its a joke! well maybe, haaaaaa)
Skip down the hallway, and see how many people look at you. (this is specially directed to Doug, try it and let us know)
Order diet water with your dinner.
Be sure to specify and get a confirmation at the drive up window, that your order is "to go".
Sing along out loud at the Oprah.
Give plenty of notice to your friend that you can not attend their birthday party, due to a headache.......
When the money comes out of the ATM, scream out "I WON, I WON, I WON......."
Tell your kids, while at the dinner table, that due to the economic situation, one of them will have to go.
This is for the guys. Go to the Pharmacy, bring a few boxes of condoms to the Pharmacist, and ask where the fitting room is.
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53 comments:
Sorry, that was kinda sexist. Okay you girls can try the Pharmacy thing if you want. In Fact that might work even better for the theme of this post, oh yea.
You reminded me of a funny story one of my Cuban friends told me the other day. She said that when she lived in Cuba you could only buy one kind of condom and they were made in China. Her boyfriend was a well-endowed Latin man (not Chinese) so there were always problems with condom breakage.
Cindy, that's funny. But see, that is why the wife took me to the vet for one of them 2 for 1 special. She said the dog had to be spayed anyway, why not me too. Don't gotta worry bout not breakage anymore. ha
drl,How dare you threaten me with what Steve may have said. I helped put his ashes in Guam's ocean. He's turning over as we speak.Renee Larson had soooo much to say about your dysfunctional family but,I never posted that. You are lower than low in the spectrum of the Human species.Stay insane,that seems to be your nature!!!
I vote that Joanna and DRL keep their feelings about each other off the blog, I am sick of seeing the hatred. I am not taking sides. It is setting a very bad example to any of our young ones that may happen to read what their parents are blogging. Does anyone agree with me?
They really push each others buttons don't they? For me it's like dinner and a show.
Mat, you always have the best comments.
To Juls response. I am so, so tiered of the negativity and the personal thrashing of each other, back on forth on this blog. If you have something personal to say to someone, e-mail or call them. The rest of us don't need, nor care to see it! And if your going to say something that you know is going to hurt someone's feelings, regardless... even if it is to the person you are responding to, my advice...better keep it to yourself. Negativity only snowballs people! It takes more energy to be unhappy than it takes to be happy.
I am not the BBMFIC on this blog. But if I were, I would 'ZAP' all inappropriate or harmful communications. But then again, that would be sensor-ship. Good thing I am not the BBMFIC! I would go major ZAP happy! ;) Dilemma? There is a braking point, or limit...don't ya think to this?
Can't we keep it clean and fun folks?
Oh shoot, here we have another aledged threat going on here, this time from Jo to DRL.
Now I am getting so very sick and tiered of this crap.
DRL, time for you to stop communicating with Juliet and Jo indefinitely on this blog, before it gets to deep. Don't push their buttons.
Jo, that was low of you to mention my deceased brother Steve in that fassion. That was very low of you!
Drop it! All of you!
Before I go to bed tonight, I just have one more comment to make before I snooze with a clear conscious. Be very conscious of what your write and how it may effect others. You may be laying out or expressing your expressions or feels to another individual. Think before you post a comment. What you post may not only effect you or the person you are posting a response to, but others as well. Think of the others that you may effect, hurt or offend before you write a comment. Think ahead.
Ric,what did I miss?
Mat, Jo's statement.
Yea Joanna that was pretty low of you to make a comment like that. I will pray for you.
Thank you Ric, I knew you would back me up. Anyone else agree that the personal mean comments exchanged here are loathsome? What purpose do they serve?
Well, I'm more from the boys will be boys school of interpersonal relationships. Even though it may not always be boys....anyways you get the idea.
However i do commend you on working the word "loathsome" into the discussion.
Nicely done.
Sounds like a 10 dollar word Doug. You makin fun of us Whitetrash rednecks?Hahaha.
Heaven forbid.
Yeah, loathsome, I think that was the first time I ever wrote that word before. . . . loathsome. . . . sounds horrific huh?
And I think you misspelled it Juls.
I believe there's an E in it what say you Doug? Oh did I mention being the "Elder" means you're the go to guy for these things?Hehehe.
According to MS spell checker, I spelled it correctly.
Maybe I'm thinking of Potatoe.Hahaha.
I will rest on this subject for now (unless another insult or attack comes to me or my kin). DRL, I love you brother! Steve I miss you. Jo, I am praying for you too!
Mat, I come from Idaho, and I still can't spell potatoe. Hahaha!
Pray for drl.He brought it up in the first place,if you can recall.I only responded to his attack on me.Steve knows who buried him and the lengths we went to find the ideal spot which happens to be on the northeast part of Guam.A very pristine place.Sam brought the music and we bid him farewell at a beach named Sagua.
This was in response to "pathetic loser" Read what he says to me.
Ric,pray for yourself.Renee shared how you wanted to pass the Larson dna to her.Plain and simple,sick!
Jo,How can you post things like this on a public forum? Thats really low. You talk about Steve but yet he's not here to have anything to say in the matter. How can you say you care about Steve when you trash his brothers in an open forum. How did you get to this point in your life Jo? Why all the hatred? I am praying for you.
Also,Joanna I notice a pattern.First you were fighting with DRL but now he has signed out and now you are picking on Ric.Why?
Oh and Jo,I'll pray for you.And Sam too. So sad!
mat,Keep on praying if you wish. You don't know "why" but,I won't go there now. Steve is not here. I know that.drl and ric and yourself know that also.drl brought him up. Just reread what he said to me.ric is a whole different story.I know I respond to attacks but,my father always taught me to do that. I am not going to take it lying down.My mind works as it does.That's all.
Jo, DRL and RIC have happy fulfilling lives with their wives and children. You are the one that sounds sad, and lost. Leave the guys alone. I don't want to listen to you anymore. I think everyone is sick of hearing from you concerning your feelings for the Larson family. It is inappropriate and mean. You aren't defending yourself, you have a grudge against them and it isn't any of our business. Shut up already.
Oh, and Jo, hitting guys below the belt must be something your father taught you, but that doesn't make it right.
Matt and Cindy since you both agree that you like "dinner and a show". I thought you might enjoy some fictional literature.
"What's that smell in this room? Didn't you notice it, Brick? Didn't you notice the powerful and obnoxious odor of mendacity? Yes, sir, I think I did... Cat On A Hot Tin Roof by Tennessee Williams.
"I am sick of seeing the hatred. I am not taking sides. It is setting a very bad example to any of our young ones that may happen to read what their parents are blogging. Does anyone agree with me?" By Juls Dean's Circle Blog
Hmm some how the last author displays confusion of her theme to set a good example and reduce negativity by attacking one of the other female characters on the blog thread with out doing some careful reading of previous posts. Is it possible that her character is displaying an inappropriate attachment to the happily married men that she writes about. Naaaa
Just remember Y'all, what people do with you they will do to you. by Dr. Phil (but I think Oprah said it first but she may have learned it from the wise old ladies in her life.
Juliet, I read as much of the history that I could find, but it was hard to keep track since they posted comments in so many places.
My heart started out in the right place just asking for some peace between Joanna and the guys.
I guess I got upset and defended the guys because I am actually pretty good at understanding how hurtful the words made them feel about their family.
Although I think the guys appreciate me backing them, I am sorry about my hurtful comments that I made.
Juls, leave Dr. Sparks out of this. There isn't one of us here, except maybe you, who didn't eat at his table, Sleep at his house, play at his hotel or what ever business venture he was into or benefit from his kindness and attention.
From now on, I am staying out of it which I guess is what I should have done in the first place.
Dealing With Manipulative People
An Excerpt from the book: In Sheep's Clothing
By George K. Simon
http://www.rickross.com/reference/brainwashing/brainwashing11.html
that last post is a link to a page that explains how people are manipulated but I can't seem to get the active link to post so you have to cut and paste it.
At the risk of getting my eyes gouged out allow me to take advantage of this brief cease fire to remind everyone to exercise good blogging judgement.
"A soft answer turneth away wrath."
So chill the fuck out.
Yep dinner and a show folks. Reminds me of Peanuts. Lucy and her psychiatric help for 25cents.
I thought it was a nickel.
Better still was Calvin and his "Swift Kick In The Nuts" booth for $2
Matt, you crack me up! Love it!
It was a nickel Doug but I couldn't remember.Thanks. Thats why you're the blog meister. I loved Calvin and Hobbes.
Yes Juls, Mat is the man! Mat tells it as it is! No bull crap! And the food that he cooks is great!
Spam will kill you in the long run.
Death by Spam, what a way to go!
"He sure looks good, must be the Spam that has preserved him so well".
SPAM probably could kill you. (Is it still a mystery meat?). But gosh darn it, its yummy!
Spam kelaguen,spam fried rice,spam sushi,fried spam,spam stew,spam pork and beans,spam sangwich wif tabasco,spam salad,BBQ spam,spam and eggs,spam and fish,spam and oh shit I'm really hungry now! Yah you can die from eating spam but you'll die wif a smile on your face.Aaah.
Mat, I just ate a late dinner. Now, after what you just wrote, I'm hungry again! Gott'a dig through the pantry and eat some SPAM!
I'm sorry Ric.You know I have a one track mind. OK scratch that. Two track mind. Food and Beer. I remember on Guam they had a contest at Gibsons(Guam shopping center)for spam recipes and you wouldn't believe the turnout.They had executive chefs from all the hotels and grandmothers and hunters etc etc. It was incredible. They also had one for the brown tree snake(in an effort to eradicate them)but thats another post.
Mat, Food and Beer! Yea Mat, you see, great minds do think alike!
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